Thursday, July 3, 2014

Letting Go...

My good friend, and one of the most amazing educators I know, Andrea Trudeau, shared some wisdom with me when I had my baby a couple years ago that has been embedded in my mind ever since. When I first returned back to work after having my daughter, Gia, Andrea and I were talking and she shared with me something her mother had told her about parenting. She said that being a parent is a series of "letting go" moments. That day I returned to work was one of the hardest days of my life. I'll never forget that drive to work and how sad I felt that I had "left my baby." After all, we had been inseparable since the minute she was born, and now I felt I had "left her.” Luckily, that first day was the hardest and it got better after that. One of the things that helped me was that talk with Andrea and hearing her mom's words of wisdom. I started embracing "letting go” as a natural part of the parenting process. With parenting, you're "letting go" at so many stages of your child's life: early on with childcare, their first day of kindergarten, and eventually middle & high school. Then there are instances such as their: first sleepover, school dance, first date, college, and moving out. There are so many things I can think of. I have barely begun this "letting go" journey with my little one, but I'm at least arming myself with an open mindset for "letting go.”

When I learn something that I like and it makes sense to me, I relate it to other things in life. I make connections. That's what happened with embracing this idea of "letting go.” From thinking about it with parenting, I've transferred it to something else that I love so much: education.

I went to a Genius Hour session at an EdCamp this year, and the Self-Determination Theory was mentioned. The theory says in order to boost intrinsic motivation it is important to focus on three main aspects: autonomy, competence, and relatedness. This made so much sense to me because we truly learn something when we have some choice in what we want to learn, can successfully accomplish something, and are able to make some connections.
In the classroom, implementing things like Digital Badges or Genius Hour would be great opportunities for allowing students to have more control of their learning. Digital badges can motivate students to want to accomplish their own learning goals. And focusing on the "passion-based" tenets of Genius Hour is one way to drive student motivation. By creating learning opportunities like these, we are "letting go" of some of the control, and at the same time empowering students’ curiosity and interest in what they are learning.
As caring adults and educators, we can embrace "letting go" in so many ways, sometimes in our classrooms and sometimes in the way we think. We all know that things change in education all the time. Embracing a "letting go" mindset can help when something is changing that we've known for quite some time. Letting go doesn't mean you stop caring. In fact, it shows you care a lot. Letting go is not easy. Especially when all we want is the best for someone, or for something. It's easy to think well, if I control what's happening, that will have the best outcome, and that is not always the case. What's important is that we instill the necessary values and skills in our children, so that when we do let go, they will be ready and able to succeed in life.

We need to let go, in order for our children to grow.

Embracing “Letting Go” can be a powerful thing.

8 comments:

  1. Letting go is still hard for me when I leave my daughter at the door every morning. Something I'm not sure I'll ever get used to.

    Letting go of control in the classroom is essential in many ways to student-drive, highly engaged learning. Let go of the coursebook and it's methodical and distanced approach to topics. Let go of punitive classroom management techniques that just alienate students and assert teacher dominance. Let go of the feeling that you need to cover the curriculum content rather than give the students time to learn how and what they need. Good post!

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    1. Getting used to letting go may not be something I'll ever get used to either! I hear you! There are so many times when I have to step back and literally remind myself that my actions are what will make the difference. I think it will always be a little struggle within us, and that's OK.

      Like you said, it's essential to let go though. Thank you for your words! They mean a lot!

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  2. Maria - you are amazing! I appreciate you more and more every day for the wife, teacher, mother and friend that you are. Yes, letting go is all part of life's journey, but it usually followed by grabbing onto something new. Your honesty and courage is admirable. I feel blessed to have connected with you through twitter and #engage109 Be great my friend! -jimmy

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    1. Thank you for your words, Jimmy. They mean more than you know! In any aspect of our lives, being able to let go does, like you said, bring something new. It's how we react to, and deal with the new that can be empowering and defining. Sometimes it takes more of your heart to get through it. Sometimes it takes more of your mind. I too feel blessed that we connected!! Can't wait to continue learning with you. You inspire!

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  3. Ah - so many people find that "letting go" is so very hard! It's nice to see teachers spreading the word that it's NOT about control or management - it's about the students being engaged in their learning. Thanks for the reminder!

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    1. You're so welcome, Joy! Letting go is something we need to do so we can empower our learners! I agree about being engaged in learning. That's when they'll remember what they learn the most. Thank you so much for your words. They mean a lot!

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  4. Maria,
    Wow! You continue to amaze and inspire me in all you do! Love the blog and the comparison of letting go like we must all do with children of our own. Daily I live this idea and it becomes more regular with each passing day as my children get older. A good way for us to look at our students as well. Just as our own children are sometimes afraid for us to "let go" or for them to try things on their own when they are small, I see the same in our students, ironically more in the older ones. They are so used to being guided down every path that sometimes, taking that step of independence is scary for them. They need the same encouragement that we do sometimes. What I see is those independent learner growing without the same fears and loving it. We just need to take the first step. Thanks for continually inspiring me and always helping me incorporate every new thing out there!

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    1. Wow! Thank you so much for your words, Lisa!! Your insight is right on-point. I can see students (and our children) being afraid sometimes to take those steps alone, and then when they see they can do it, it's the best feeling in the world for them. You know your students SO well. Your care and hard work, is beyond compare. You're such an amazing teacher (and mother)! :)

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